Saturday, May 28, 2011

WIN SOME, LOSE SOME, WINSOME


Class is frustrating at best. Class is a living metaphor for life. I didn’t get taken in the 5/21/11 Rapture either. Nuff said.

disgruntled


OUT AND ABOUT IN TOLEDO, OHIO


A gaggle of police following a Rastafarian on bicycles. Notice the beautiful ply wood decor covering Ted's Hamburgers. This inventive and stylish makeover is seen throughout the city; a keen addition to our landscape during the FINKBEINER years.




I realize the image may throw a few of you off -- this isn't a flashback, it is Carnival Night! Please, don't feed  the carnies, they will follow us home. The excitement truly never ends in this town.




Normally, the parking meters will read, "FAIL." At first, I believed that it was some cosmic power prophesying my future. Then, I realized it was just a sad joke on the meter's part when it ate my change and gave nothing in return, including an hour of parking. This particular day, however, it was dEAd. A cosmic reference to my career, no doubt.






You gotta love when anyone can run at full speed with nuts in their mouth. You gotta love when any middle aged woman chases after a squirrel with a camera just because it has a nut in its mouth.




I Love this face.




ART VS. WTF IS THAT?
Andy Rooney is a trip to begin with. He must be about 172 years old by now, truly an animated fossil. God knows what the portrait in his attic looks like. Speaking of art, in this vid, Andy lets us know what he thinks of certain modern art pieces. I have to admit it, there are a few in there that I was thinking, “glorified masturbation.” (I mean, I thought that about the art, not about what I had planned for my day). Of course, I am very much in love with representational art so tend to be a bit put off when it comes to some abstract work.

I was once challenged (in terms of realism) with, “What’s the point – you may as well take a photograph.” Say that line in your head with a Turkish accent though. Well, perhaps my point is that I put my own spirit and style into the image. No matter how skilled the artist, we cannot replicate a model 100%. There are too many subtleties and nuances. So no, you may as well NOT take a photograph.  Another soul countered the anti-representational stance with: People only say that because they can’t draw.  Let us end the argument there.

I am going to buy a canvas, paint my rabbit’s feet and let him run across it several times. I will call it, “ACROSS THE GRAVE.” I bet I win all kinds of accolades from the Abstracters… Damn you Abstracters! How you mock me... Maybe I will even get a place reserved on the 7th floor… my luck, the freaking bunny will be the more popular artist.







SPEAKING OF ART - THE MOBA
This is a MOST exquisite site:
MUSEUM OF BAD ART
I was very ill when I stumbled upon this image of RONAN THE PUG:

Erin Rothgeb
18" x 24", acrylic on canvas board
Purchased by M. Frank at a Boston thrift store
MOBA #333
"O Danny Boy..."
The artist's affection for her dog far outstrips her artistic skill. Paint is slapped on the canvas with random brushstrokes, creating matted, impossible fur. Done in such a hurry that the canine anatomy was not even considered, the artist still captures Ronan's playful sweetness. Or perhaps the pup has just lapped up all the spilled eggnog at a holiday party and is ready to attempt a clear tenor rendition of "Danny Boy."

From: Museum of Bad Art: Masterworks by Michael Frank and Louise Reilly Sacco, Ten Speed Press.







I laughed so hard at the complete RONAN EXPERIENCE that the other people in my house thought there was something seriously wrong. In fact, people were set to phone 911. I should probably add that I was on some very good medication.



ILLUSTRATION TRUTHS



NEW STORE!!!
Yes, my minions, I am working on a separate store for RAGING BUNNIES. There are a few new things, but it is mostly me transferring the RAGING BUNNIES category from STUDIO566 over to its own store.  I believe this move will prove to be a good one.
I will have to clean up the side panel of this blog, however, as it is getting really busy over there. I am planning to dump the scrolling product windows and have the store banners only. This is my glamorous life—do try not to be jealous.





CHURCH LOGOS
I am stuck on one of my logo designs. It is for a ministry – so subconsciously I may be fighting against it. In my research I found this site:

http://churchrelevance.com/resources/top-church-logos

The beautiful thing about the top logos is that most of them aren’t beating you over the head with WE’RE A CHURCH! Of course, it hasn’t exactly helped my plight. I am still chugging away at it. I plight well. I am in the part of my process I like to call the, “^&*% ^&  *$%^   #$!*.” 

Probably not a good choice... but an original by Yours Truly.



FIRST THERE WAS ADAM
One of my favorite minions sent me this link. This guy (Adam) chronicles his life experiences through his illustrations:  http://www.booksofadam.com

The post specifically sent to me was this:
http://www.booksofadam.com/2011/05/never-be-my-friend.html
Now, I must confess, I have done the same thing. I sometimes also take your photos and put them into Photoshop and have a time of it. I have many pop eyed vampires in my repertoire.  Red eyed, lip sticked, green skinned antennae repertoire. Big head/tiny body, pimply faced, large mouthed repertoire. Of course, I actually post mine then y’all unfriend me.  Some of you even send me, “I HATE YOU DON’T EVER CONTACT ME AGAIN” notes of appreciation. 

Don't ever contact me again!

STILL HAVEN’T FOUND WHAT I’M LOOKING FOR
As designers we often get “stuck,” or are in deep need of inspiration. Ok – as a designer *I* often get stuck and am in deep need of inspiration. Logo Bliss has a gallery of stupendous logos to peruse:

More importantly, we should ALL study those logos which should never have been.




AND SO
Class logo: Product expansion into China





MY RABBIT EATING A BANANA

video




MY OTHER RABBIT EATING A STICK

video



MY GRANBUN HAPPY IN GRUNGY BASEMENT

video
 



NO CONSERVATIVES!

THANK GOD!




Is that a woofer or a tweeter?



Saturday, May 14, 2011

THERE WOULD BE NO CHARLATANS IF THERE WERE NO FOOLS

I swear my classes are beginning to repeat themselves. I know I have seen these design briefs at least 3 times prior to this new class. Maybe I am Déjà vu Challenged. My company of choice (this quarter, unless I am having Déjà vu) is SMUCKER’S. I chose it. I did. It’s so… OHIO. I know Ohio.

I decided for giggles I would market their jelly in China. China does not eat American Jelly. But, since Honorable Daughter #1 has dated just about every Asian man in a 5 mile radius, I feel I have a wealth of resources at her fingertips (so to speak). Although I do remember hearing, “They don’t like me. I’m white.” The boys liked her, just not the culture. And white? That, we are. We pose a danger at the beach, in fact.
NOTE: we are gingers and we are THIS white:


Where the hell are her freckles?






 


IT IS FINISHED

I actually FINISHED my online portfolio. I have a hair too many pieces in it, but I would rather trim it down than sit here and stare at the empty screen any longer. My eyes burn.  I am also caught up on my online gallery, my resume is updated and I am now catching up on my blog…



 



AND NOW… THE ONLINE PORTFOLIO


I do not use this image.

I decided to go with Deviant Art’s portfolio site. It is simple, classy and very easy, like me! Feel free to peruse and oo and ahh – for either the portfolio OR me. OR BOTH! I shall bask either way. CLICK THE LINK. DO IT:  http://studio566.daportfolio.com/



 
CURRENT DESIGN TRENDS—MUST HAVE SITES
These sites are a MUST. They keep designers/illustrators up-to-date on trends and offer much inspiration. These two sites alone kept me distracted from life for a couple of hours. It’s like crack without the weight loss. Or itching. Or jail time.

From Graphic Design USA:
Logolounge THE 2011 REPORT
The first word on emerging logo directions from Bill Gardner, principal of Gardner Design and creator of the LogoLounge online database. Among the trendspotting: Earths, Fruits, Trees, Loopys, Monolines, Bands, Gradients, Vibrations, Concentrics, Dandruff, Commas, Series, Browns, Blackholes, Obama-inspired O's…
Obama inspired O's? Dr. Ruth is LIVID...

I am LIVID!

Check out the LINKS TAB on this site:
http://www.ideabook.com
Specifically speaking, there is a good number of links under COMMUNITY / GETTING WORK. And now,  watch me segue...
WRONG "Segue"



 

99 LUFT DESIGNS
Beware of spec work and “competitive” sites offering “rewards” for the winning design. I was amazed at the amount of people that sign up for these sitse. Designers end up doing work and not getting paid. There are many clients who insist on specs who refuse to pay us for our time if they “don’t like” any of the designs. Of course, this is true in r/t also (real time). There is NOTHING like working yourself to death for no to little pay. Like me! Check em out:

http://www.no-spec.com/
http://www.sosfactory.com/blog/articles/freelancing/99designs-review/
http://graceoris.com/2011/03/how-i-quit-working-for-99designs-crowdspring-and-mycroburst/

There’s a Filipino saying that goes: “Walang manloloko kung walang magpapaloko.” This may sound a bit harsh but it’s something to think about. The best translation I can come up with is: “There would be no charlatans if there were no fools.”


 

HOW IT REALLY GOES DOWN
Watching this was like having flashbacks...






 
BUNNY CAM!
I stumbled upon BROOKLYN BUNNY’s bunny cam. I cannot begin to tell you the thrill I experienced watching a bunny eat out of a bowl and then lay down. It was as if I were watching my own bunnies who were actually napping:  http://www.bklynbunny.com 

Then it happened. The big IT. I saw BUNSPACE.COM. Needless to say,    
Sammy and Lance now have their own accounts on BunSpace where 
they talk to other buns. I think I may need to say that I forgot to take my meds.

Sammy’s profile receives this note from some hottie named Nibbles:
Hi Samuel  and welcome to bunspace you a handsome bun.  i left you some carrots.

That TEMPTRESS! That VIXEN!

In all seriousness, this is a good site for medical and daily care information… and also for crazy people (much like me).


 


SOLD! (ALONG WITH MY SOUL)
This is actually one of my favorite designs. I am contemplating a 3rd store strictly dedicated to the Raging Bunnehs. I would like to separate them out. I have to look into it a bit more, however. At least I would feel self important.
 
CLICK



BAMBI AND THUMPER

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

http://www.jokelibrary.net/animals/d_to_z/rabbit-bamb




 
I’M APPARENTLY NOT TOO OLD…
There is something to be said for not feeling so old and alone “out there” in that wide wacky world of design and illustration. I was truly beginning to sweat the small aging stuff. This article points out some wonderful strengths in being “older” and in the market. I mean, strengths besides being able to act crazy and having people think it is endearing. I can hardly wait until I am 99 when I start running naked down the sidewalk. I do not suggest putting that on a resume.
I got your portfolio RIGHT HERE...
I am a fellow freelancer – and no spring chicken either. My business is called FREELANCE GRAPHIC DESIGN & MARKETING COMMUNICATIONS. I am on Facebook and LinkedIn as well. Please contact me through my website. I’d like to learn more about you – I’m building a network of freelancers and may be able to assist. I’d like to tell you more about my business. (www.hirelynda.webs.com).
READ HERE:    TOO OLD TO BE A DESIGNER




LINK OF THE DAY
:
The site is not advertised. The quality is excellent and the pricing is fantastic! I love it when people send me in these directions. It just goes to show the importance of networking, even if you hate humanity.
I hate humans.





FROM THE SCARIEST PLACE ON EARTH - MY SKETCHBOOK
We all have these moments...
hmmph rmmph hmmmph!







Thursday, May 5, 2011

REGARDLESS OF WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THE WORLD, IT'S ALL ABOUT ME

This has been a rather emotional month for the entire world, hasn't it? Between celebrations of a new life united and the shock and awe of a death (see what I did there?)  It has been a veritable political roller coaster ride with Sybil at the switch (that is a movie reference for all you whippersnappers: Google it). This kitsch pop culture reference reminds me, I have to take my meds...

My Alter Ego

THE UNITED STATES DID IT! WE TRUMPED THE ROYAL WEDDING!


STUDIO SHENANIGANS

Back to the topic at hand, Yours Truly. This week's work was inspired by... well... at least a banana. I do not get out of my cave much but I also stepped outside one afternoon. I feared the ball of flame hovering in the sky. After all of the vitreous floaters and spots cleared up, I realized the ball of flame was still hovering and would not fall on me. I could safely get on with it. These are the results of fruit and fear:

The assignment was to illustrate the concept of PEACE through different artistic styles. I took an adventure through Pop Art (Warhol, Lichtenstein), the Symbolist Movement (I would drop a name but for the life of me I cannot think of one right now) and Surrealism (Well, Hello Dali!). Why yes, I am trying to sound like I know what I am talking about... why do you ask?


The PEACE PIECE above (har!) was inspired by the broken coffee mug I suck the bean from every morning. I do this ritual at least 3 times before noon. I fed one of the rabbits a banana and drifted into Warhol's Velvet Underground banana, and there it is. Or maybe it was the morning hallucinations I experience until that 3rd cup. Seriously, I do not recommend drifting into anyone's banana before lunch.


The bunny rendering (ala Lichtenstein) just cracks me up. I fear it is one of those instances whereas I am the only one laughing at my joke. The above was inspired by one little thumbnail and my Honorable Number One Daughter. She is as goofy about her bunny (my GrandBun) as I am about mine. The thumbnail (shown below) is a bunny thinking bunny thoughtsWell, what I imagine to be bunny thoughts. I also move my bunny's lips and make him say it.

Bunny Thoughts Extraordinaire




I knew I wanted to play with symbols—specifically for Surrealism. I drew an organic vesica pisces. This reminded me of Lotus designs often found in East Indian/Hindu art. This made the jump to Gods and Goddesses and universal love. I am blue in the portrait to reflect VISHNU. The subject's gaze is towards the wall. The lotus wall is made up of a vesica pisces. I included my bunny ear tattoo to the design (on the wall) adding the OM symbol as his thigh. And yes, that is a real tattoo. I’m such a dork.



It's a whale swimming in the clouds. Groovy...


The latest assignment is in progress. I am working on a basketball shoe ad. I managed one little piece of the whole shebang. It is my feet. In fact, it is the view of my feet I have several times a day because I sit around with my feet propped up. I'm not using the name "Chuck Taylor" in my mock-up. The mock-up will be Penny Collins' line of high tops. I'm grabbing my own 15 minutes. All of the illustrations were rendered in Illustrator CS4. No one was harmed in the making of these projects.



MY HERITAGE

Like our fearless leader, President Obama, there has been some discrepancy about my heritage. I am posting my non-edited birth certificate for all to observe. Feel free to ask any questions, should you have them. This means questions about the birth certificate, not questions about why my couch is held together with duck tape (how ELSE would I hold it together?) – or why I put peanut butter and onions on my tuna salad sandwhich (because it’s damn good, that’s why!).



As you can clearly see, I am bonafide White Trash. Please, let us not make this about race. I *am* mixed, as you can see. My mother was Hillfolk and my father was Cracker. I *was* born in Akron, Ohio, Rubber Capitol of the World and home of the Goodyear blimp. I am contemplating an announcement to run for the office of Royal Highness of Walmarts. Let them eat cake! Lots of cake… with stale sugary frosting and a can of Bud Light.



WHAT SOME (TWO) MINIONS HAVE SAID ABOUT YOURS TRULY and/or THIS BLOG:

Dwight Bryan Says: You are never endingly clever and witty with your pithy comments and observations. I seriously think you need to add editorial writing or stand up comedy to your job skill description. 

Ronald A. Rainsberg  Jr. Says: You are the Monty Python & Firesign Theater of FaceBook ... A cult hit to many but misunderstood by more.

I am glad someone finds me humorous: it's a living hell being the only one laughing at my own wit.

How DOES the guy who plays Mr. Belvedere do it?

MY GOD! I CAN'T TAKE THIS KIND OF PRESSURE!




O SNAP
- I'M TOO OLD (ONE PERSON ON THE INTERNETS SAYS SO!)

http://www.creativefreelancerblog.com/designers/too-old-to-be-a-designer/

This article (link above) states that the general consensus is: if you are over 40, no ad agency will want you. This is exactly why online freelance work looks so good to me. I am 46 and yet… I can be ANYBODY online! I used to tell people I looked exactly like Angelina Jolie except that I was 4’ 11”. I even used a Face Book profile pic of Angelina Jolie with red hair and glasses. After a SLEW of unsolicited and lecherous private notes from all around the world, I pulled my own reigns back. I put my own face up. The unsolicited lecherous private notes stopped.  I was so saddened by the entire incident. I mean, about the fact the lecherous notes from around the world stopped. I had gone GLOBAL!



SPEAKING OF FREELANCE COMMISSIONS:
Since the birth and advent of MOTORCYCLE MAN, the commissions have been rolling in! I must thank all two of you that have hired me! I found the following page of inspiring logos. If you find yourself “stuck” in the logo process, a good methodology of digging yourself out is to find GOOD logo work to study. That is the key word, “GOOD.”

http://inspiredology.com/120-brilliant-logos/

Simple is always best. Simple does NOT mean easy, however. Paul Rand and Saul Bass are two of the most brilliant logo designers ever. Their use of image and little to no text approach is baffling in its genius. I want to be baffling in my genius, not just baffling.


LOCAL NEWS

A local news station featured a story about teen plastic surgery. The performance of the 18/19 year old with green eyeshadow was stellar. She explained how her dad supported her decision (what?) and he said, "Get them as big as you want!" (WHAT?). The Coup de Gras was found in one of  the final shot of the story was DOWN HER SHIRT.
As seen on: http://www.wtol.com

Really? I mean... REALLY?
My dad supported my decision...
I fear I must abdicate the crown for Royal Highness of Walmarts...




RANDOM POST OF THE WEEK
Seriously...

I used to keep this posted up in my cubicle when I worked in the first level of a place we liked to call "Hell" -- not to be confused with when I worked in the second level of a place we liked to call "Hell."




MOVIE TIME!
Here is a collection of this week’s distractions. The first one may as well be one of my rabbits eating a banana. I think it is funny. I do not know WHY I think it's funny, but I do. The Educational HP LOVECRAFT film won accolades at the 2005 Sundance Film Festival. It is unholy and remarkable -- much like my life. Wait... my life is unholy and UNremarkable. But I digress...

Then, witness the sheer genius of Joaquin Baldwin. He won a gig with DISNEY with this short animation.

NOM NOM NOM



Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom Nom .
Hey, it inspired art.


SEX ED

H P Lovecraft
Official selection at the 2005 Sundance Film Festival.
Director: Craig Macneill.


GENIUS
 


Joaquin Baldwin